I don't know if anyone even knows this about me, but I always have and always take others hurt as my own.
No one knows I can hurt because I've been given this title of no emotions, but I'm so blocked up with them that I just ignore them until that one thing taps in and everything breaks down.
You know what fustrates me the most? When someone has issues but they don't trust you enough to tell you so they lie, because they believe you will judge.
How lowly am I thought of?
I hate being seperated from someone, I hate having everything so good and then someone pushes you off the top, I hate being on edge, waiting for myself to fall.
Hate is a strong word, but you know what? I am strong.
I'm strong enough to hide everything from everyone, not because I am ashamed but because I don't want to feel any more hurt.
I'm strong enough to take not only my feelings smacking me in the face, but I take yours, his and everyones.
But I'm not strong enough to show it, I'm not as strong as I make myself look.
I can't cry, I don't know or understand why but I can't. I'm so scared that I can't let anything out.
I want to cry. But you know what I use instead of tears? Words, I sing.
I write songs and get lost. Last time I know I shed a tear was when I wrote my last song, not heaps but one. It stained the paper with meaning and feeling. That song is tatooed in my mind and I will never forget what it means.
I'd love to help you, but can't I hurt too?
I know you all think I have no reason, but Emily Grace McKay can surprisingly hurt too.
I always hurt.
No comments:
Post a Comment